Monday, 16 May 2011

An alternative look at our defeat v Villa.......

It would appear from yesterdays game that the players had their own 'walk'. Unfortunately for us it was displayed on the pitch for 90 minutes, starting at 16:00. Apparently it was called the White Flag Movement (Not sure how it got that name) but nobody told RVP, as he worked tirelessly to get us something from the game. The walk consisted of a refusal to defend for the first 20 minutes, which meant you weren't allowed to track your man, ball watch at every opportunity & not save any shots. Michael Oliver (The Ref) was also in on the act, as any foul in a significant area of the field could not go in our favour, it was only fair. For the remaning 25 minutes of the half, the players adopted a netball approach, where RVP was the only player allowed shoot in the opponents area, but he was allowed to be joined by Walcott (playing the role of goal attack) but he (TW14) wasn't allowed to shoot (saves embarrassment). So half time came and we were 2-0 down. Splendid.

Instead of sorting out tactics during the interval AW took the players up to the Diamond Club and they players had a 'gourmet hot dog off'. Early reports suggest Jens Lehmann won by a mile. RVP came second but the medical staff were unaware that having horse placenta fluid in his body it instantly burns off calories. Another misdiagnosis from our ever excelling medical team.

The players, not happy with their 1st half display took a while to adjust to playing on a full stomach and became completely immobile. To us it looked like a lack of urgency, but really it was because they all had the athleticism of Rick Waller. AW refused to take this seriously either, throwing on Chamakh when we were in desperate need of a goal. Oliver later disallowed a goal scored by Chamakh because he realised something most have been up for him to score. We weren't to be denied though as Nicklas Bendtner, poorly controlled a cross and whilst he never had any intention to score, the ball ricocheted into RVP's path to make it 2-1 . Only then did he realise what was going on, everything was explained en route back to the halfway line. Then with seconds remaining we got a free kick right on the edge of the box, prime position for RVP to strike. But no, he layed it off to a player who has barely walked since September. Needless to say it didn't go in. FT 2-1.

The players weren't finished there though, as it was a nice mild day they took the opportunity to walk around their beautiful surroundings and throw the occasional wave, as they won't see their home for another 3 months. Its been emotional for them all.

Walk over. Supporters OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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